Just another day

I guess blogs are supposed to be a log of what you felt during certain events and not necessarily a log of events occurring in your life. Well, the same things keep happening to me and I am not necessarily sure how I feel. I don't feel lost. I know where I am. I guess you could say I don't know here I am going. I don't really like it. I sit here and pout, but I can't be Special. From the beginning of time I am sure men have had these same feelings before me. I guess what remains to be seen is what I do with these feelings. Will I sit idly by as life passes or will I stand up and do what I am capable of. I feel the first path is the path that I have taken since I was born. I have never really done anything, unless it was handed to me. Even if the things I have been given have come to me by peculiar ways, I still feel that in no way have I done anything for my life of my own accord. I do feel that everything that I have been given has been put to use as an effort to advance myself. I just want to do something for myself, but then the question arises of how one goes about this. How do you start? I guess the men who find the answer to this question go on to greatness and the men that do not settle for mediocrity. By no means do I say that a man who cannot start things for himself cannot achieve greatness. I am only saying that a man who cannot start things for himself will not achieve greatness, until someone else catalyzes his ascent. Seeing this, I realize that I have two choices in life: settle for mediocrity until greatness finds me, with the understanding that it may never be so inclined to even look; or learn enough about myself to realize what I lack and then add the pieces that I need.
In reflection things seem easy, but in reality finding the pieces that we are missing is hard. Suddenly the images of my friends pop up. They are all good people, but it ends there. I have a hand full of people that have been given the tools to achieve greatness. I have a supporting cast of only a few that can aid me in my search for a fruitful life. I hate the idea of someone relying on friends to achieve his success; I think friends should only play the role of enjoying in your self-made happiness. I realize that this is not the case and in order for a man to succeed in life he must surround himself with the right people. I unfortunately have not made this choice. I surrounded myself with good people, but not many great people. Again this is my fault. For handful of great people that I know, I realize I made the effort to meet them. If a person had a special quality, then I took the active role of sucking them into my life. I will say now, that everyone in my life is wonderful and I appreciate them with all of my being. I just think to myself what would be different if I would have surrounded myself with different people. This is a question that can never be answered, although I do find it an intriguing anomaly.